new to area, want to meet people, well traveled and educate.
it might just be me, but her shirt looks like it might say, i like girls
It's flattering to me that he cares so much about me, but it sort of feels like he should be more relaxed, and get the notion that I am prone to dumping him any day now out of his head. I know he's crazy about me, and this might be some sort of defense mechanism -- he doesn't want to get hurt. But I've told him that, if we had a problem, I'd talk about it first, not just announce one day that it's over.
hi I am looking for the right wome.
When he pulls away, you stay centered/anchored. You stay "where" you are. It's like a rubberband, he's pulling away. If you pull away too, the rubberband will break or if you chase him into that cave, you are causing slack and he can't bounce back to you as easily. Getting angry, doing a lot of questionsing, etc. pushes him further and delays the cave time. You can reach out to him lightly/supportively but don't criticize him, etc. At some point after the caving scenario, you can and should let him know how that makes you feel. Reassure him that when he's in his cave, you still love him but you are hurting because he's shut you out. Turn the table on him and remind him how it feels by pointing out the fact that he gets upset when you don't respond quickly to messages, etc. Do it in a supportive way though. "you know, M, it does hurt me when I don't see or hear from you for 5 days at a time. It makes me feel as though you've forgotten about me. Just like the other day when you were worried because I didn't answer ______". Observe his response.
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